Some people do what they want, inconsiderate of God.
Some people ask God to help them do what they want.
Some ask what God wants, but still may not be willing.
Some people ask God with a willing and sincere heart.
I asked God over and over for some help, and He didn't answer and didn't answer. I hurt... I was in so much pain... and yet heard nothing. But near my breaking point, God finally told me the answer. It was something I would have done, too... Why did He wait so long to tell me?
The problem was that... I wouldn't have taken it to heart. The answer... would not have changed my character. If I had heard it before, I would have been glad, agreed, and practiced it a bit, but would have eventually forgotten. It would have been some ink stamping a simple answer on top of my heart.
However, the pain... it softened my heart. It made it go from a rock to play dough. And when God finally stamped down the answer... It sunk to my core. I wont forget. I don't just know, I understand. This hasn't changed my knowledge, it has changed who I am.
It's difficult to deal with this fact... that no matter what, the solution may be just sitting in pain. I thought that, as long as I was willing to act upon an answer, there would be no reason for God not to tell me what He wanted. Yet God wants not a changed act, he wants a changed heart.
Some people ask God with a willing and sincere heart, ready for the pain it will take to hear the answer.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Learn - A Higher Desire
Here's my first "life lesson" related blog post. This is something that God taught me last year, and I've been refining it more and more since then. It's a very important aspect to a lot of other concepts I believe, and so it's a good place to start!
We all have desires. It's difficult to distinguish what we are supposed to do with them, but we know they are there. The Bible talks about nature, flesh, sin, temptation, denial of self, and a variety of other subjects that can be hard to put our finger on and work with. Yet without desire, we'd be stale and actionless. All action is a combination of ability and desire. If either ability or desire is gone, then nothing happens.
Ability + Desire = Action
Galatians 5:17 discusses both the negative desires of the flesh, and the positive desires of the Spirit, so there's obviously both good an bad possibilities. There are multiple verses in Proverbs (37:4, 13:19, 11:23, 10:24) speaking not only positively about desire, but saying that God will fulfill it (under conditions) and that "the desire of the righteous ends only in good."
Now, where does this desire come from? Do we just spontaneously generate desires when we are born? They just form out of nowhere? Some secular sources say society creates them... but of course, society is made up of people, and they have to have a source for their desires ;) I think our desires come from God. Where else?
Now wait just a minute (those of you jumping to what could be a logical conclusion). "If it comes from God, how come I can not have what I desire all the time?" You have to factor in our ability to pervert what God has given us. Our free will gives us the power (that we regularly use) to abuse the wonderful creation and selves God gave us. This creates a simple philosophy of desire; there are two kinds of desire:
1. Good, pure, wholesome desire that God plans to fulfill.
2. Perverted version of our healthy desires, usually resulting from impatience and selfishness.
I believe that every desire we have, God plans to fill somehow. He wants to give us what we want! (There's biblical evidence in Proverbs shown above and elsewhere for this.) But what sin does is allows us to try and fulfill these desires in our own way and our own time. Did we ever do something that we didn't desire? We soon generate new desires from these good desires.
Pre-marital sex is an abuse of a gift God wanted us to have. Stealing is giving into our desire to possess material (which is normal and natural) in a way that doesn't reflect God's character. When we lie, it's an abuse of our freedom to express ourselves (thus perverting truth), usually as a way to gain something we were not yet meant to have. Some desires will not be fulfilled until heaven!
Now, what this means is that we do need to relinquish our will to God. We don't destroy our desires. We don't abandon ourselves. We live who we are, who God created us to be, in His way and His timing. Looking at what we want, what we desire, what we are passionate about, is a key to learning what God has planned for us! We just need to use prayer, counsel, and scripture in this search so that we don't run the risk of misidentifying a desire as from God.
This also emphasizes the importance of patience! How many sins are based on the fact that we just wont wait? God's got a plan to leave us fulfilled, if we'll be patient, seek Him, and let him do it!
From here, I'd usually start talking about how I think, in our pursuit of "denial of self", we miss out on what I believe to be the biblical idea of Christian Humanism. But we'll save that for some other time ;)
(I have not read the book Journey of Desire by John Eldridge, but it is about this same idea. I own it and do want to read it soon, haha.)
Music
I want to share the music I'm listening to while I write these. I love music, I love its emotion, I love the message that the melodies convey, and I love sharing this part of myself with my friends.
Beirut is awesome! My friend David was playing it in the Cafe, and I had to find out who it was. I'll spare you a ton of links, but here are some of my favorites! LISTEN TO THEM!!!
Mount Wroclai (Idle Days)
Postcards from Italy
The Concubine
We all have desires. It's difficult to distinguish what we are supposed to do with them, but we know they are there. The Bible talks about nature, flesh, sin, temptation, denial of self, and a variety of other subjects that can be hard to put our finger on and work with. Yet without desire, we'd be stale and actionless. All action is a combination of ability and desire. If either ability or desire is gone, then nothing happens.
Ability + Desire = Action
Galatians 5:17 discusses both the negative desires of the flesh, and the positive desires of the Spirit, so there's obviously both good an bad possibilities. There are multiple verses in Proverbs (37:4, 13:19, 11:23, 10:24) speaking not only positively about desire, but saying that God will fulfill it (under conditions) and that "the desire of the righteous ends only in good."
Now, where does this desire come from? Do we just spontaneously generate desires when we are born? They just form out of nowhere? Some secular sources say society creates them... but of course, society is made up of people, and they have to have a source for their desires ;) I think our desires come from God. Where else?
Now wait just a minute (those of you jumping to what could be a logical conclusion). "If it comes from God, how come I can not have what I desire all the time?" You have to factor in our ability to pervert what God has given us. Our free will gives us the power (that we regularly use) to abuse the wonderful creation and selves God gave us. This creates a simple philosophy of desire; there are two kinds of desire:
1. Good, pure, wholesome desire that God plans to fulfill.
2. Perverted version of our healthy desires, usually resulting from impatience and selfishness.
I believe that every desire we have, God plans to fill somehow. He wants to give us what we want! (There's biblical evidence in Proverbs shown above and elsewhere for this.) But what sin does is allows us to try and fulfill these desires in our own way and our own time. Did we ever do something that we didn't desire? We soon generate new desires from these good desires.
Pre-marital sex is an abuse of a gift God wanted us to have. Stealing is giving into our desire to possess material (which is normal and natural) in a way that doesn't reflect God's character. When we lie, it's an abuse of our freedom to express ourselves (thus perverting truth), usually as a way to gain something we were not yet meant to have. Some desires will not be fulfilled until heaven!
Now, what this means is that we do need to relinquish our will to God. We don't destroy our desires. We don't abandon ourselves. We live who we are, who God created us to be, in His way and His timing. Looking at what we want, what we desire, what we are passionate about, is a key to learning what God has planned for us! We just need to use prayer, counsel, and scripture in this search so that we don't run the risk of misidentifying a desire as from God.
This also emphasizes the importance of patience! How many sins are based on the fact that we just wont wait? God's got a plan to leave us fulfilled, if we'll be patient, seek Him, and let him do it!
From here, I'd usually start talking about how I think, in our pursuit of "denial of self", we miss out on what I believe to be the biblical idea of Christian Humanism. But we'll save that for some other time ;)
(I have not read the book Journey of Desire by John Eldridge, but it is about this same idea. I own it and do want to read it soon, haha.)
Music
I want to share the music I'm listening to while I write these. I love music, I love its emotion, I love the message that the melodies convey, and I love sharing this part of myself with my friends.
Beirut is awesome! My friend David was playing it in the Cafe, and I had to find out who it was. I'll spare you a ton of links, but here are some of my favorites! LISTEN TO THEM!!!
Mount Wroclai (Idle Days)
Postcards from Italy
The Concubine
My Family's Role in the World Revolution
See - As I Stand Worshiping
I've decided to start off with something I "saw" during an all-worship chapel here at school. I don't like calling it a "vision" or anything, but I do think that this image that I more "felt" than saw is something God showed me. I doubt it will sound near as good written as opposed to when I speak it, but I'm considering presenting this (and a few others like it) for the Sankofa event here at school.
As I write this here, it's written fresh out of my mind from my memory of it. Envision it with me.
As I Stand Worshiping
As I stand worshiping, arms raised to Christ, I see my body there in armor. I'm wearing an armor with elaborate designs on it. Yet this armor, obviously of previous glory, is dirty and damaged. It's color is faded, and it's full of deep gashes. This armor has protected me.
As I stand worshiping, in the armor, Jesus comes along. He looks at the armor and reaches out to it, feeling each damaged area. In His eyes is a spark of creativity; I can see in them that He sees the value, the good work, and the potential in the armor. He goes the straps of my breastplate, gently unbinding them and releasing each one. He carefully removes each piece of armor, setting them aside.
As I stand worshiping, Jesus removing the armor, I see the wounds. This armor, beyond me and a gift from Him, was placed on me to protect me. It served its purpose well, but it doesn't protect everything. Some of the blows to the armor had pierced inside. My body has wounds from where the attacks had gone through.
As I stand worshiping, wounded to the core, Jesus begins to hug me. He wraps His arms around me, with an embrace both gentle yet strong; the grasp you can not escape, the grasp you would never want to escape. As He holds me, the wounds slowly heal.
As I stand worshiping, wounds healed by Jesus, I see what has happened. The wounds are healed; scars remain. I wont forget what I learned from those wounds, and I'll be stronger from them. Yet I am healed. I am free from the bondage of the mistakes and suffering in my life.
As I stand worshiping, enjoying my relief, Jesus prepares me. He brings something to me, new armor. This is like the armor He removed. It is covered in glorious images and patterns. It glistens in the light. It was made just for me. He gently places each piece against my body, and pulls the straps around, tightening them to a snug fit.
As I stand worshiping, prepared by Jesus, I see myself ready. I know I am strong from the battles I have fought before. I know I can rely on Jesus. I know he has put things in place to protect me. I know he will restore me again. I am ready.
As I stand worshiping, ready, Jesus sends me out. Now that I am renewed, Jesus send me back out into the world. I lower my arms, the image fades... the armor is figurative... but the work is real. I am refreshed.
Oh wow. I just started writing, and the pattern formed. The formula, switching between myself and Jesus, formed. He acts>I see>I know. I'm so glad I wrote this out! I hope you enjoyed reading it!
As I write this here, it's written fresh out of my mind from my memory of it. Envision it with me.
As I Stand Worshiping
As I stand worshiping, arms raised to Christ, I see my body there in armor. I'm wearing an armor with elaborate designs on it. Yet this armor, obviously of previous glory, is dirty and damaged. It's color is faded, and it's full of deep gashes. This armor has protected me.
As I stand worshiping, in the armor, Jesus comes along. He looks at the armor and reaches out to it, feeling each damaged area. In His eyes is a spark of creativity; I can see in them that He sees the value, the good work, and the potential in the armor. He goes the straps of my breastplate, gently unbinding them and releasing each one. He carefully removes each piece of armor, setting them aside.
As I stand worshiping, Jesus removing the armor, I see the wounds. This armor, beyond me and a gift from Him, was placed on me to protect me. It served its purpose well, but it doesn't protect everything. Some of the blows to the armor had pierced inside. My body has wounds from where the attacks had gone through.
As I stand worshiping, wounded to the core, Jesus begins to hug me. He wraps His arms around me, with an embrace both gentle yet strong; the grasp you can not escape, the grasp you would never want to escape. As He holds me, the wounds slowly heal.
As I stand worshiping, wounds healed by Jesus, I see what has happened. The wounds are healed; scars remain. I wont forget what I learned from those wounds, and I'll be stronger from them. Yet I am healed. I am free from the bondage of the mistakes and suffering in my life.
As I stand worshiping, enjoying my relief, Jesus prepares me. He brings something to me, new armor. This is like the armor He removed. It is covered in glorious images and patterns. It glistens in the light. It was made just for me. He gently places each piece against my body, and pulls the straps around, tightening them to a snug fit.
As I stand worshiping, prepared by Jesus, I see myself ready. I know I am strong from the battles I have fought before. I know I can rely on Jesus. I know he has put things in place to protect me. I know he will restore me again. I am ready.
As I stand worshiping, ready, Jesus sends me out. Now that I am renewed, Jesus send me back out into the world. I lower my arms, the image fades... the armor is figurative... but the work is real. I am refreshed.
Oh wow. I just started writing, and the pattern formed. The formula, switching between myself and Jesus, formed. He acts>I see>I know. I'm so glad I wrote this out! I hope you enjoyed reading it!
Welcome to the Stadium!
Hey there!
So if you know my sleep habits, you know I'm an early to bed, early to rise kind of guy. But I slept from 6:30PM to 10:30PM, and now I'm pulling an all-nighter, haha. It's 2AM, and after catching up on the blogs of friends, I realized I need to make my own. I've had blogs before (search "jacfalcon" at your own risk), but not so much good stuff to fill one with at the time.
God teaches me things constantly: through classes, through friends, through my brain, through prayer... Some of the best lessons... through pain. I do my best to write down these lessons (you should see my rickety old notebooks), and they are constantly built upon (a main reason I haven't started this sooner). I enjoy sharing these lessons in person, fleshing them out in words. I'm a speaker, not a writer. However, I've realized it's more available to my friends in this form, and fleshing these thoughts out this way would be wise. I enjoy sharing these lessons in person, so if you ever want to learn more about what God is doing, just ask me :)
Blog content? This blog will be a mix of many things. I'll probably focus on more practical, thinking lessons (though they, of course, will contain much emotion). Once in a while, they'll be more artistic (I'm actually a good poet, and sometimes God "shows" me things). Maybe, on occasion, something fun.
Once again, if you know fairly well, you'll know I don't really have a "private life". I'm always willing to share almost anything, and will probably do that often here. Don't take the fact that I share these thoughts online lightly; many of these are deep pains of my heart, mistakes and burdens that I wrestle with often.
I'm gonna start writing my first post RIGHT NOW! I have lots of ideas, but as of yet, I have no clue what it'll be. You can follow the blog with a (free) gmail account (http://www.gmail.com), or just subscribe via email on the side, if you want to receive some kind of notification on updates.
I hope this blog can encourage you, empower you to serve others, and possibly even save you from making the same mistakes I have! Now wouldn't that be nice ;)
Being transmuted (transformed and improved) by Christ constantly,
Shea "Stadium"
So if you know my sleep habits, you know I'm an early to bed, early to rise kind of guy. But I slept from 6:30PM to 10:30PM, and now I'm pulling an all-nighter, haha. It's 2AM, and after catching up on the blogs of friends, I realized I need to make my own. I've had blogs before (search "jacfalcon" at your own risk), but not so much good stuff to fill one with at the time.
God teaches me things constantly: through classes, through friends, through my brain, through prayer... Some of the best lessons... through pain. I do my best to write down these lessons (you should see my rickety old notebooks), and they are constantly built upon (a main reason I haven't started this sooner). I enjoy sharing these lessons in person, fleshing them out in words. I'm a speaker, not a writer. However, I've realized it's more available to my friends in this form, and fleshing these thoughts out this way would be wise. I enjoy sharing these lessons in person, so if you ever want to learn more about what God is doing, just ask me :)
Blog content? This blog will be a mix of many things. I'll probably focus on more practical, thinking lessons (though they, of course, will contain much emotion). Once in a while, they'll be more artistic (I'm actually a good poet, and sometimes God "shows" me things). Maybe, on occasion, something fun.
Once again, if you know fairly well, you'll know I don't really have a "private life". I'm always willing to share almost anything, and will probably do that often here. Don't take the fact that I share these thoughts online lightly; many of these are deep pains of my heart, mistakes and burdens that I wrestle with often.
I'm gonna start writing my first post RIGHT NOW! I have lots of ideas, but as of yet, I have no clue what it'll be. You can follow the blog with a (free) gmail account (http://www.gmail.com), or just subscribe via email on the side, if you want to receive some kind of notification on updates.
I hope this blog can encourage you, empower you to serve others, and possibly even save you from making the same mistakes I have! Now wouldn't that be nice ;)
Being transmuted (transformed and improved) by Christ constantly,
Shea "Stadium"
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